


I choose you

by momorawrzzz



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-02-08 08:14:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12860478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momorawrzzz/pseuds/momorawrzzz
Summary: Emma's engagement to Hook has just become common knowledge, but what happens when Emma realizes she did stand a chance with Regina, can she fix it all?I either rock or stink at summaries without trying to spoil so give it a go? Will be multi chapter not sure how regular to update.SwanQueen is endgame.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> I DO NOT own OUAT or any of the characters in the show.

She turned on her heel and ran, that was all she could do, the only thing she could remotely think of as a way to somehow lessen to blow, but it hadn’t worked. Running hadn’t been able to stop the feeling in her chest, her heart was breaking, or was it already broken at this point, she hadn’t expected it to hurt like this, not this badly, she couldn’t breath, each ragged inhale burned, chest tightening painfully as tears rolled down her cheeks in rapid succession. She’d allowed herself into the current predicament she now found herself to be in, she’d let this all happen, rather than cutting it off before she’d fallen in this deep, she’d kept quiet all those years, she’d never said anything, instead she had tried to find her own happiness, it hadn’t been real but it had been a good distraction, but with Robin dead and gone of recent she had no diversion anymore, she hadn’t been able to throw herself headlong into anything with anyone else. Instead she’d been left to watch her from afar, watch as he’d slid in, as he’d slowly but surely worked his way into the family, closer to her, and now he had her, now all chances of ever working up the courage to tell her the truth were gone, the excitement on her face, the happiness at Zelena having taken notice of the jewel on her finger. 

She had swiped at her eyes to un-blur her vision, she couldn’t tell where she was or where she was going, she needed to know where she was in order to teleport home safely, her mind was a mess, visions of that smile she’d learned to love so much floated around her head, but she couldn’t find the little spark it had once stirred in her, because now she couldn’t convince herself it was towards her, she couldn’t imagine that she’d brought that joy onto the pale features, no that had been him, it had always been him and she hated herself for ever having allowed her heart to persuade her mind towards the lie. Perhaps if she had made a move earlier, before he’d come into the picture, or if she’d just gotten off her high horse for five minutes to tell the blonde that she wasn’t just an idiot but her idiot, she should have just said to hell with her mother’s mantra.

Her sight was finally cleared of the salty liquid and she took a deep breath, she wasn’t aware of the voice calling her name out, didn’t see the Sheriff running towards her looking so concerned, so worried, all she saw, all she heard was silence and blackness as she engulfed herself in a cloud off purple smoke and teleported back to her home. 

Emma had ran right to the spot the brunette had disappeared from and that was when she had broken, her knees hit the pavement in the middle of Main Street, she screams her name once more as if she can be heard and slams her fists to the black top. She had then felt a hand on her shoulder and allowed it to stay as she’d let tears of her own that had built up flow, the look on Regina’s face before she’d fled had been like a knife right through the heart, it had been an answer to all the questions she’d never asked the darker woman, for fear of the answers, or rejection, and then the realization of how fucked she’d let her life become smacked her full force in the chest. Another hand had come to rest on her other shoulder and she was being helped to her feet, led away, led home, or rather to a house she’d thought she could make a home, but her home was something she had just crushed. 

 

Regina.

 

At present the Mayor sat a glass of cider in hand, fireplace roaring, Henry was with Emma and the pirate for the night, so here she was utterly alone, no one to talk to, no one to lean on. She had thought by now she’d have no more tears left to cry, she would be all dried out, alas this was not the case. Her best friend, her son’s other Mother, her co-parent, and so much more was engaged now. Engaged to a man who had once tortured her, but she’d never told her, and she figured it safe to assume that the former captain would’ve left this detail out to the Savior as he knew how close she and Regina were, he’d even expressed concern that they spent too much time together at several points. Then the voice would start, reminding her of all the bad and evils she had done, telling her that if she deserved a second chance so did he. And then the loudest of them all, the chant that had haunted her for years, since she was just a young girl coming into her prime, ‘Love is weakness,’ it repeated over and over, never ceasing, she was able to ignore it most of the time, she had Henry, she had a family and they most certainly did not make her weak, they instead made her stronger. But now in this moment she couldn’t help but let the words start to sound true.

A sudden knock at the door jerks her from her thoughts, the glass she’d been holding slips from her grasp and falls to the ground shattering, amber liquid forming a puddle, she remains frozen to her seat for a moment not fully broken from her trance when she hears the knocking become more of a pounding. She forces herself to stand and isn’t paying close attention to where she’s going, “Shit,” she hisses out through clenched teeth as a shard of the tumbler becomes logged in her bare foot, the sudden sting snaps her to full attention. With a flick of the wrist the mess is cleaned and the afflicting piece of glass gone as well, she’ll have to deal with the injury later, she somewhat limps to the front door of the mansion, her foot throbbing with each time she puts her weight down onto it. The pounding of fist to door continues and she grips her head, gods just what she needed now a migraine to top it all off. 

“Regina ! I know you’re in there come on please,” and her blood runs cold, all color drains from her face as she recognizes that voice, the one voice she wanted to hear so badly yet didn’t all at the same time. 

“Em-,” she clears her throat as she hears just how cracked and broken her voice sounds,”Emma?” she doesn’t know why she questions it as if she hasn’t the slightest as to whom it is wishing to join her inside. 

“Let me in,” the blonde’s voice is strained as well, the brunette focuses on the handle and unlocks the door at the same time opening it with her magic before she turns and limps back to the couch, “Oh my gods Regina are you alright?” the Sheriff asks as she takes notice of the darker woman’s change of gait. 

“Fine dear, just had a minor bump in the road,” she shrugs and gestures for the blonde to speak, explain why she is here. 

“Are yo-,” a hand comes up to prevent her from finishing her question. 

“If you’re going to ask if I’m alright once again I suggest you don’t, I will not change my answer so please just tell me why you’re here so I can go back to my lonely evening Miss Swan,” the blonde feels the icy shot of the title, feels a sudden pit in her stomach, the tone, the walls, she’s seen it all before from the woman before her, Regina is upset, more than upset actually, she’s hurting and broken, going back to her old methods to ‘make it all better’. 

“Why’d you run off?” she knows she won’t receive a response or if she does it will not be a sufficient one but it’s worth a shot because she just needs to get her to talk to her, just needs to be able to have this discussion, she’d wanted to speak to her right after but then Henry and Killian along with her Mother and Father had found her in the middle of Main Street and dragged her back home. She’d finally been able to slip away with the excuse of I need some sleep and once in her room had teleported to 108. The deafening silence is all the answer she is going to get it would appear, so she takes a different angle, “I would’ve come sooner, but I couldn’t escape as soon as I would’ve wished to.” 

A slight nod, mocha orbs cannot, or rather refuse to meet emerald ones. 

Emma approaches the Mayor cautiously, slowly, she doesn’t know how to bring this all up, how to just say ‘I saw the hurt in your eyes and I’m hurting too, but I didn’t know we had a chance and now it seems I’ve blown what little chance was left’. She reaches a hand out towards the crossed arms of the brunette, she hesitates as she sees the slight movement as if she is going to pull back before she even makes the contact so she thinks better of it and drops her hand shoving it into the back pocket of her jeans. 

“Regina, I just want to talk, I just want to know what’s bothering you, why are you slamming the walls back up?” The brunette turns to face the fireplace so she doesn’t even have the chance of looking at the other woman. 

“I don’t want to talk about it, it’s not going to change anything either way,” the Mayor sighs shuffling her weight to the non injured foot. 

“Hey at least let me heal your foot?” the blonde offers, she doesn’t receive a verbal reply instead the older woman limps over to the sofa and sits down crossing her legs so that the afflicted is on top. She waves her hand as if to say ‘get on with it’. Emma approaches and kneels down on one knee taking the olive foot onto her bent one, she handles it as if its the most fragile thing, brushes her fingertips lightly over the top of it, she keeps focus lips pulling into a thin line as eyes zero in on the cut. She hovers her other hand just above the wound and she feels her magic coming to the surface, watches it as it curls around the foot she holds. Regina’s breath hitches as the tingling sensation takes over her, she hadn’t ever experienced the Savior’s magic on herself, not in a healing or positive sense at least. And it floods her brains with memories of the times that they’d used magic together, the times they’d simply worked together for a common cause, times it had been only each other on their side when no one else believed. And she can’t handle this onslaught in this moment not with all the feelings it brings to the surface, not with the woman who makes her heart pound and ache, race and bleed all at the same time. She jerks her foot back suddenly, the sudden movement throwing the Sheriff off balance slightly as she retracts her hands and falls to her ass. 

“Regina are yo- ,” she cuts herself off knowing to ask that question once more with the way that the Mayor had been acting may get her kicked out of the mansion for the night and in all honesty she was hoping to stay here as long as possible to guarantee no one was awake when she snuck back to her home, or maybe she could just spend the night on the brunette’s couch and come up with some sort of story later on as to why’d she’d left, and not used the door, or her car. She sighs, she hadn’t thought this through before just coming. “I’m sorry,” she offers looking up at the woman in front of her. 

“You don’t even know what you are sorry for do you Miss Swan?” she stands and moves quickly past the blonde who is still sitting on her rear between couch and coffee table not daring to move just yet. The darker woman heads into the kitchen grabbing two glasses and a fresh decanter and brings them into the living room. “Do get off of the floor ,” she scoffs before reaching over blonde curls to place the glasses down and then uncaps the decanter. Emma doesn’t need to be told twice she scrambles to her feet and sits down on the couch, the former Queen pours the amber liquid and hands glass to the younger woman. 

“Listen I know you were upset,” she sighs finger tracing along the rim of her glass, “Did you even realize I ran after you? Did you even hear me screaming your name? I get that you may not want to talk about it but I need to say some things,” she doesn’t know where the sudden courage comes from, she hasn’t even taken a sip of the cider yet, she watches as the olive toned woman sips at her own not making eye contact let alone looking in her direction, she seems to be distracted by the fire roaring in the fire place. “I- ,” she pauses, “Regina are you listening to me?”

“I can hear you and that incessant drone of yours quite well,” she snaps out , she doesn’t mean to but she doesn’t quite care in the moment either, she just wants to hear her out and go back to her drink, back to her heartbreak, back to her lonely night, “if you hadn’t guessed by now I was hoping you’d simply get on with it,” the venom from here words isn’t quite there anymore and Emma notices this but doesn’t comment she simply keeps her mouth shut, the darker woman sighs, “say what you need to or just enjoy a drink with me in silence, I’m in no real mood to talk,” she says downing the rest of the amber contents of hers. 

“I just never knew when would be the right time, never knew if it even would be a conversation or if I’d simply get shut down, you’d throw these stupid walls back up, I didn’t think I stood a chance and I think you know exactly what I mean, what I’m talking about, I saw your face Regina, and we know each other. We know each other so well, we have similarities, we have differences, but we can read each other and I hate that you hid this so well for so long, I should’ve picked up on it sooner, if I had then I wouldn’t have missed so many chances to tell you it all. You always said I was an idiot, that I didn’t know what I had right in front of me and you were so right, you were practically screaming at me to open my eyes,” the brunette shakes her head. Her emotions are a mess right now she wants to hear it but she doesn’t, what would it change? She was engaged now, tonight she’d confess her feelings and then what? What happened tomorrow when they woke up? She couldn’t let her do this, couldn’t let herself believe that this would change anything, she may have feelings for her but she loved him. Dating for distraction was one thing, but deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone and get a house, maybe even start a family was something entirely different. 

The Mayor stands, “No,” she shakes her head and spins locking onto green eyes, “No you don’t get to do this, you don’t get to go there! You do not get to do this to me!” she shouts and Emma drops her gaze, she had every right to react like this, to lash out, she was hurt, hurting, and she was right it wasn’t fair for her to do all of this. “You just came into my town, you took what you wanted, but you never wanted me, you found plenty of ways to keep busy, plenty of people to fill your bed, your heart, I gave up on you ever seeing me years ago,” she scoffs and downs her drink dropping the glass to the table. “Now you want to come over here and profess love for me? What is it Miss Swan? Last minute jitters? Did you say yes too fast for your liking?!” 

Emma’s jaw drops and rises no words coming forth, she can’t formulate anything to say to the woman in front of her, she doesn’t know how to make it better how to make up for all the hurt she has certainly caused. “Regina I-.” But the older woman cuts her off once more, it would seem she is not in the mood for any excuses tonight.

“Oh no, you do not get to just apologize, you said yes, you said it for some reason, whether it was for legitimate feelings or the fact that you suddenly thought you no longer stood a chance is a topic for later, I do not quite want to know as of right now. All I know is that I have been here this entire time and you maintained your relationship, if you truly wanted me you would have found a way to end it with him long before any of this came to be!” she shouts voice wavering, the blonde stands silent, she can’t argue with what is true. She can’t tell the Mayor that she is wrong because she isn’t, not entirely so at least. She wishes to comfort her friend, she wants to take the hurt and the pain away, she knows she’s messed this all up, gotten them to this point. Regina spoke the truth, she had been here, just as she always had been and when Robin had passed Emma knew how she had not been the best support system. What had she done? She’d panicked, the woman she had always denied feelings for was suddenly free of the binds of a relationship, the Sheriff had not been though, and had in an indirect way, once again taken Robin from the former Queen. Gods she had royally fucked up. The thoughts all flood into her mind now like water breaking through a dam all at once not slowly but forcing it’s way through. First she had brought Marian back those years ago and then, decided to drag everyone down to the Underworld with her to save Hook, which resulted in Hades, the Olympus Crystal and the death of Regina’s love, he’d jumped in the way and been disintegrated. After that Regina had pulled away, she knew it was to not misdirect her anger, because Emma knew deep down the brunette had blamed her for it, the good ole butterfly effect, the lighter woman’s signature move it would appear when it came to fucking up. 

She needs to make this better and she doesn’t know how to or where to begin, is there even a way to achieve such a feat? 

“You have every right to be mad,” the blonde approaches the darker woman slowly, fully aware of how this next move may go over but not quite caring she has to try, has to do something, anything, if Regina won’t talk, won’t let her do so then perhaps actions do speak louder than words, or silence. The Sheriff pulls the Mayor towards her wrapping strong arms around the tiny frame, she feels the fists against her chest, pounding against it lightly the fight all gone, but that doesn’t deter her. “I should’ve at least been there for you after what happened Regina, I shouldn’t have let you step back for so long, but I knew you blamed me,” she feels the head on her shoulder shake and feels the tears as they soak through the thin material of her shirt. “Don’t deny it, I know you did, not entirely but you needed someone to blame with Hades gone, I was the next best thing, I’d dragged you all along, including our son, I know you didn’t agree with that bit but you refused to let me go alone, you, my parents, the kid, my family. I’m so sorry all I’ve ever seemed to cause you is trouble, pain, heartbreak, but I really mean it Regina, these feelings are real, I should’ve told you sooner, should’ve ended things with Hook, but I didn’t think you loved me like this, I settled I guess. No it doesn’t make it any better or right but it is what it is I-,” and then the former Queen is pulling back and she let’s her because she doesn’t want to force the woman she’s in love with to do anything she doesn’t want to. 

And then her hands come up to grab the lapels of that damned red leather jacket that she’s always said she’s hated but she honestly loves and her eyes flicker from emerald down to pink lips and then back up before she pulls the younger woman to her and their lips meet, and it’s full of pent up frustrations, full of years of denying feelings and tensions. The blonde parts her lips to the onslaught she knows she’s inviting by doing so, she needs it, needs Regina like she needs air, she’s needed her and wanted her for so long, and the Mayor isn’t one to disappoint as soon as the lips against her own separate her tongue slips between them and brushes along pearly whites briefly before finding the lighter woman’s tongue and flicking against it, she sucks it into her mouth lightly. A moan bubbles up in Emma’s throat and she does nothing to stop it from pouring forth, but at that sound the reality of it all comes crashing back down and the brunette is pulling away, a frown graces pale features at the sudden loss, “Emma we.. I can’t.. You made your choice,” her tone holds sadness to it and the blonde’s throat constricts as olive hands fall from the jacket they’d just been clinging to, “I won’t be the other woman again..” she offers a sad smile and mocha orbs drop from emerald as the darker woman turns intent to grab her glass and refill it, drown herself in the amber liquid that has become her friend and comfort in this moment. 

“Regina, I-,” I what? I choose you? But she hadn’t, she’d said yes to the pirate, she could call it off, she could do that, she had to, she didn’t love him the same way she loved the woman before her, “I don’t love him the way I love you,” and at that the shaky hand that had reached for the glass stills and the brunette’s head snaps to glance over her shoulder, her eyes show that she wants to believe the words that had just come forth but they also show that she doesn’t know what to believe anymore. 

“I’m not going to force you to make a choice, and it doesn’t have to be me, I will be fine dear, one day, but don’t give me false hope,” she tries to sound as if she doesn’t care but the other woman sees right though it. 

“I mean it Regina, I’ll do what I need to, I love you,” she says it with such conviction and at that the former Queen breaks, the tears that had been threatening to fall for quite sometime now begin to well up and trail down her cheeks, her head snaps back away from the blonde so she won’t see, but she’s already seen the contortion of her facial features to know, she doesn’t want to say it back but she does because what happens if tomorrow she comes back to say never mind I’m staying with him? She swipes at her eyes furiously and fights the lump in her throat begging her voice to work with her. 

“Please just go,” and Emma wants to rush to her and hold her, wants to scoop her up and stay with her but she knows why she wants to be alone, and she understands it, so she nods and heads back towards the door.

“I’ll call you tomorrow.”

And she’s gone and then, only then does Regina crumble, falling to the ground, her fingers coming up to her lips feeling them, feeling her still on them, still tasting her, the woman she was so in love with and had been for so long.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this update has taken so long guys, been so crazy busy and really honestly lost the motivation to write for the longest but now here I am back again and will be working on getting some more works out too! Please bear with me! Lemme know what ya think! Hope you all enjoy, some more angst coming.. oops lol

The next morning comes and the brunette sits up in her bed groaning, she clutches her head, it’s pounding, and the ache in her heart returns, the alcohol had numbed her throughly the night before, after the blonde had left she’d finished an entire decanter of cider and drowned her sorrows, tried to forget the pain, the heartbreak. She flicks her wrist and pain pills along with a tall glass of water appear in her hands, she needs to have some relief from the tension and pounding behind her eyes, gods she should not have drank all that but as soon as the door had closed and she had broken down the amber liquid had called to her, it had been her friend, her comfort for the evening as she’d imagined what life would be like the next day, today, if the Sheriff came walking in telling her she hadn’t been able to leave the pirate that she had indeed made the right decision in saying yes to him. 

 

 

Meanwhile across town one Emma Swan wakes after a very sleepless and restless night, she turns to look at the man in bed beside her and she wants to cry, she’d come back to find him asleep, she hadn’t had it in her to wake him to end things, but now she knew what she needed to do, best if she just rips the bandaid off in one go, she shakes his arm, “Killian ?” he groans rolling over towards her and the way he looks in this moment, her heart clenches, he had become a better person, changed so much, and a lot of this was done for her, she’d been his motivation. “Emma,” he husks voice full of sleep, “Something wrong?” he picks up on the tone and begins to stretch to rouse himself, “We need to talk Killian, I did something last night..”

And he’s bolt upright in the bed next to his fiancé in a second flat rubbing the remnants of sleep from his eyes, “Did something?” the blonde slips out of the bed to stand shuffling on her feet not making eye contact, fidgeting with her hands. Her body language is all to telling for him, his brow furrows, it was almost like a stand of shame rather than a walk of it, “Or did someone? I know you didn’t come back until much later..” he trails off and his eyes bore into her, she feels his gaze on her even if she isn’t looking up to see it. 

“I didn’t do that,” she says and it’s true, she wouldn’t do that, she shouldn’t have even kissed the other woman, but then she hadn’t stopped Regina, hadn’t pushed her off or back when she’d grabbed the lapels of her jacket. She may call her an idiot but she wasn’t one, she had known full well in those two seconds of pause what was about to occur, “but I did kiss her,” she may not have initiated but she had in fact kissed her back and done nothing to stop it, “Hook I love her, I just never thought I stood a cha-,” he cuts her off mid word.

“And what you don’t love me?!” his eyes flash, it’s not just anger that she sees there either, but hurt, “Why would you say yes? Was that all I was, the backup if you and her Majesty couldn’t be together?” his voice trembles ever so slightly as he tries to hide his emotions, tries to keep it together, but he isn’t successful at all. 

“I love you too, I wouldn’t have said yes if I didn’t, but it’s not the same or as it is for her and believe me I know how fucked this all is, how this all must feel, I’m sorry, I should’ve just been honest with you, but the way I love you is not the same way I love her, I can’t spend the rest of my life with you happily one hundred percent, and you deserve someone whose completely there and devoted to you one thousand percent, someone whose not in love with another,” she sighs as she stumbles over her words because it just feels as if it’s all becoming even more of a mess in the moment. She reaches down to her finger and spins the ring around it, she slips it off and holds it out, offering it to him to take, he scoffs. 

“I can’t believe I let myself believe it, I was right after all this time, to worry about all the time you two spent together then? Was last night even the first time you two shared a kiss?” he wants to ask if there was ever a time you shared more but as much as he’s hurt and wants to toss insult and question out of the pain he feels he knows the woman stood in front of him too well, knows she’d tell him, his hand reaches out to take the ring. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

Emma nods slowly and drags her eyes up to meet his finally, “Yes,” she doesn’t know what else to say besides the simple word, he sighs and moves towards the dresser, pulls out his favorite pair of black jeans and slips them on over the boxers he’s slept in, everything is silent, she simply stands there, she notices he’s placed the ring down atop the bureau. As he dresses she combs her hand through messy golden curls and heads to the bedside table to grab her phone checking the screen for any notifications, nothing, she turns and looks at him, opens her mouth as if to speak, to say something but no words come to mind, her jaw just falls and then closes once more. 

“I’ll just go and stay on my ship for a few days, keep it, think about it, because we both know how her Majesty can be,” there’s a hint of jealousy underlying with something else she can’t quite put her finger on, or is it that she can’t find the word for it, she’s not sure, “I’m sure soon enough you’ll realize that you did make the right decision in saying yes to me Emma,” and he brushes past her pausing for a moment to press his lips against her cheek and then he’s on his way out the door, and out of the flat. 

She falls back onto the bed and it’s suddenly too large, empty, she clutches her phone in her one hand still and raises it to unlock it, she hadn’t really expected to hear from the Mayor but at the same time there had been an inkling of hope for at least some sort of snarky text message to be on her phone, but no she had hurt the darker woman, and though she had finally been honest with her now ex fiancé they couldn’t and wouldn’t just be jumping right into anything. A sigh falls from pale pink lips and she hears the soft knock on her doorframe.

“Where’d he go?” it’s Henry, she doesn’t sit up but instead drops her phone to her pillow and pats the open expanse of bed next to her, he takes the signal for what it is and makes his way over.

“He’s going back to the Jolly Roger for a bit, I uh-,” she swallows thickly, how did you explain this to your kid without getting his hopes up in case it all went to shit? Because there was a possibility that it would, it could, it didn’t matter how in love two people were if damage was done, too much, or irreversible. He wasn’t the little ten year old boy who had once showed up at her door in Boston anymore though, he was growing up, he’d seen just as much craziness as she had since coming to Storybrooke, save for the dragon and he hadn’t ended up in the Enchanted Forest with her either but still, he wasn’t your average teenager, he was going to be an adult soon enough, in the blink of an eye. “I called it off, I don’t want you getting hopes up Henry but it’s not him I truly wanted to be with..” she trails off and he seems to digest the words quickly as before she has a chance to even try to continue he’s speaking.

“Ma,” one of his hands finds one of hers and squeezes it in a reassuring, comforting way, “I’m not ten anymore,” it was almost as if he was in her head, it was that Mill’s intuition, how she’d addressed him and the conversation, he was definitely a pure combination of herself and Regina without a doubt, “You ran after Mom last night, remember I made it to you first after you ran out, I heard you scream her name, I saw that last bit of her magic, she teleported away. So what happened?” And she let’s out a chuckle, it’s such an inappropriate response but she can’t help herself, she finds it funny how he just jumps right to it, how he already seems to have an idea of it all, she takes a deep breath and gets under control.

“I went over there, snuck out after I said I needed sleep, I never thought I had a chance, and I realized when I saw her face just before she turned and left.. the hurt, that moment when you watch the one you love go to someone else.. and it just snapped in my head, I knew then I had a chance, I had for the last six years, but my idiot self was too blind to see it until it was too late. I ran there, we talked, we kissed, and I did what I had to today, I couldn’t do that to Killian or Regina or myself, but I don’t know if it’s going to work, if too much has already been done, I don’t know what kind of shape your Mom’s in right now, if she’ll want to see me or speak to me in this moment, but I want to try, I want to try and at least make things right. I really do love her, I would love to be with her, to explore what neither of us has even dared express for so long, but I’m not going to lie kid, I’m scared.” 

“Well then why are you still here?” that’s all he says, in regards to her ramblings, he took it all in, he honestly had, but he wondered why then was she here and not on her way over to 108 to see how his other Mother was doing, to try and start repairing whatever damage they had done to each other. “Get out of here Ma, I’ll cover for you if Gram and Gramps come over,” he smiles and sits up at that standing and making his way silently out of the room. 

Once he’s left she runs her hand through her hair as she stands from the bed, her eyes catch the glint of the ring on the dresser once more, she steps towards it and picks it up, she doesn’t know what to do with it, put it away? Find a way to get it back to him? She opens her underwear drawer and decides to lay it in there for the time being, now to go talk to Regina.

 

 

Regina now sits in her study, she’d managed to get the initial headache to go away, her head was still pounding from time to time so here she sat lights off, shades closed, glass of water in hand as she leaned back in her chair eyes closed, perhaps she should have attempted to just sleep more but she hadn’t wanted to stay in bed, suddenly her phone begins to vibrate the usually soft buzzing sound across the top of her desk sounding so much louder in the deafening silence she had enveloped herself in. An eye peeks open to see just who is trying to contact her, ‘(2) New Text Message: Miss Swan’ she sighs, well it had only been a matter of time before the blonde rejoined her in the world of the awakened, she didn’t know what the messages would say, why the other woman hadn’t called, or attempted it, or even better yet why she hadn’t just done her usual unannounced visit. The Mayor’s stomach tightens as uncertainty swells, as doubt begins to seep into her mind, if Emma was simply texting her it was probably just about Henry, it couldn’t be anything serious or about last night, so was this it? Had she simply woken the next day as the brunette had predicted to say it wasn’t what she wanted, that it was just easier to be with the one handed pirate? She takes a large gulp of her water and is just about to unlock her phone when there’s a sudden knocking on her front door. Or perhaps the messages had been her saying she was outside, to let her in, she shakes her head and rolls her eyes, she really was an idiot. 

She makes her way out of the small room and to her front door, she unlocks the door and begins to speak before she’s even gotten it fully opened, raising her voice up in order to be heard, “Next time perhaps call and I will be more inclined to respond or perhaps send you to voicemail to let you know you’re unwelco-,” the door opens to reveal someone who is most definitely not Emma Swan, and not who she would hoped to have see for sometime after all of this. Standing in front of her a scowl in place, arms crossed is none other than Killian Jones, the Mayor falters, but only for a second before she tries to not show her obvious discomfort at this confrontation that he must have planned, great had the idiot decided to text rather than call to warn her of his rogue mission? Why wouldn’t she have just used her damn magic for once to teleport in ahead or something, the darker woman stands straighter and crosses her own arms, her irritation at the blonde in the current moment is the perfect motivator for her anger and snark. “And to what do I owe the pleasure Captain?” she rolls her eyes stepping forward to lean against the doorframe and at the same time let him know he’s not getting an invitation inside, if he wanted to cause a scene then it would be out here for someone to see, she would not let him in her home alone ever. 

“Believe me this isn’t some fun social call your Majesty,” he hisses out the title, “This is your warning, that I hope you’re not just playing some sick twisted mind game on Emma, she doesn’t deserve that, if your issue is with me then we can have it out on our own terms but do not bring her into this,” and she can’t help herself as anger flashes across his features, she throws her head back and laughs, he really thought, and after all this time everyone may have been fooled by his becoming a better man but yet in the face of someone threatening to take away love from him his true feelings shone through. “There is nothing funny about it,” he snaps out and his arms uncross, she regains her composure and smooths her hands down to brush non existent wrinkles out of her skirt as she clears her throat and looks up at him tilting her head as if to say ‘go on’. “All I’m saying is that she’s called things off and I have tried to warn her to be cautious when it comes to you, I always have,” and why does that last bit not even remotely surprise her, “So do watch your back because if you so much as lay a finger on her.”

She stands to her full height and glares at him full on her hand comes up as if she’s about to hurl magic, “Are you threatening me Captain?” her voice is dripping with venom, she feels her magic so close to the surface, the urge to throw him off her porch in one smooth motion, have him fly high in the air and land with a bone shattering blow is a strong one. “I would suggest you leave. Now. And do not come near me or my home or my family again.” 

He steps into he space but she doesn’t move, his hooked hand comes forward, the metal gleaming in the sunlight, her eyes dart to it for a moment before finding his eyes once more, she feels the closeness of the cool metal to her skin and she thinks back to the last time it had been this close, he waves it at her in some form of a threat she supposes, she knows he’s saying something else but her focus now is to do this, she grabs his wrist and twists his arm dragging the hook away from her, it was too close for comfort, “She doesn’t really love you,” he spits out twisting his body and yanking his arm free of her grasp, she doesn’t know what he’d said before that, doesn’t know if it would have made the statement make more sense or if that was simply his last jibe at her since she’d caused him pain but she let’s him pull himself free, she steps back into her doorway. 

“We shall see,” she grins, giving him her best toothy grin before she spins on her heel and closes the door behind herself locking it in the same motion, as soon as it’s closed her back presses into the hard wood and she gasps as tears sting at her eyes. The facade of the confidence fades as she leans against it, his words, the final ones she had heard at least, hurt, they were too close to the doubts in her head, Emma couldn’t truly love her, it wouldn’t last, she would do or say something irreversible. 

She pushes herself off of the door and makes it back to her study to grab her phone and finally check the two messages from the blonde, to see what exactly she had figured constituted as enough warning for that which had just showed up on her doorstep. 

Miss Swan [8:59am]: Hey can I swing by?  
Miss Swan [9:01am]: I think we need to talk 

[9:11] Missed Called: Miss Swan

She sighs and see’s it’s now nearly nine thirty, she decides to send a message rather than call, she realizes now that Emma hadn’t known the Captain was going to be paying her a visit, she honestly wondered if it was even worth mentioning, of course it was, but she didn’t know how they had ended it, what terms they were on, was it really over or was it just for the time being, a break, a ‘here go and try but see I’m right she’s no good’ that he was giving the Sheriff.

 

 

Emma’s phone is still clutched in her hand as she sits in her bug right outside of her house, she’d wanted to wait until Regina replied, not just show up, not just poof in, she didn’t know how the other woman was or had been after she’d left last night besides hurt and drinking. Her phone lights up in her hand finally and she opens the message immediately.

Regina Mills [9:28am]: You may make your way here if you so desire, but come alone.. we do need to talk

Her stomach twists into knots, her heart races in her chest as she simply drops the device down onto the passengers seat and turns the car on, pushing it into drive and heading straight to 108.

 

The drive is short and she parks right out front her door in perfect alignment with the sidewalk, as she steps out of the car she doesn’t remember to grab her phone, she simply rushes towards the porch and begins to knock, almost immediately the door swings open and she takes in the fact that Regina’s eyes are a little swollen and puffy, red, she had been crying, oh gods did Emma just want to make the hurt stop to make it somehow better, she goes to say something, she gets as far as opening her mouth before the former Queen parts her lips and finds her voice first. 

“Hook came by.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer : I do NOT own OUAT or any of it's characters
> 
> So here's the next chapter sorry for the delays I am going to be pushing to get the next chapter or two written soon I hope you enjoy, read and comment please to let me know thoughts ^.^ . Something I would like to say before this one is that yes as I do follow mostly canon for this fic, time line, storyline, some events like the one that will be discussed here, for the purposes of the fic were tweaked a bit, you'll see.

“Hook came by,” Emma repeats the words that the woman standing in front of her had just uttered, she doesn’t know why other than the fact that her brain cannot seem to form a proper response or simply that she doesn’t know how to respond to the statement. Here she had made her way over to inform the Mayor that she had done what she needed to do, told Killian of her feelings, ended it with him, been honest about their actions, but now it turned out that he hadn’t gone straight to his ship when he had left the house, no, instead he had come here.. to what? Talk to Regina? And say what exactly?

The brunette hums, her blood red lips pressed together in a thin line, her brow creases as she steps back from the entrance to her home turning on her heel and making her way back inside. The Sheriff follows, assuming that’s her invitation inside, an assumption which she is correct in as the door magically closes behind her.

“He seems to believe I am simply toying with you, that I shall soon enough tire of my games, whatever games those may be and you will then run back to him so that he may pick up the pieces of you I will surely leave scattered around,” there’s a hint of bitterness in her tone, a flash of hurt shines through mocha orbs, a scoff, and then a bark of laughter follows as Regina stands back still facing the blonde, Emma stays rooted in place by the door, having not yet moved, she doesn’t know what to say, how to react. Did Killian really think that Regina would hurt her? Did he have it in his mind that she was still the Queen? Mind games were still her modus operandi? She wants to scream, she hates this, doesn’t want to see Regina hurting anymore than she already is due to her own idiocy yet her now ex fiancé has apparently taken it upon himself to swing by and make sure that the wounds stay, that they don’t have a chance to heal, but perhaps just grow deeper. 

Her legs finally move, finally cooperate and take her closer to her son’s other Mother, her head moves side to side in a shake that says ‘no’ as she finds words, “Regina, I know you, I don’t know why he came over here, when he left me he said he was going to his ship, he had no reason to come here, he shouldn’t have done that, shouldn’t have came to you and said anything, I get it that he’s hurt in all of this too but it’s me that caused this not you. If he has any issue still he should’ve just talked to me about it, I know this isn’t some game to you, you’re not her anymore,” the Mayor’s back still faces her as she tentatively steps closer and closer, she takes a deep breath in through her mouth releasing it through her nose, she hadn’t meant to cause all of this mess but here she was now. “I’m sorry, I really am, for all of this, the pain I’ve caused you,” she’s close enough now that all she would have to do is lift her arm and slim fingers would brush against olive skin, but she hesitates to do so not sure if her touch would be welcome in this moment or not.

A sigh, she watches as arms wrap around a curved waist, her self comfort mechanism, “Apparently he is the only one who can have his slate wiped clean at the end of the day, or so he thinks..” she trails off and if the blonde could see dark orbs right now she would see the torn look in them, the indecision of letting the Sheriff know or not of how the man she was probably still in love with wasn’t all he swore to be, how he still had his own dark side, you couldn’t simply become a hero, couldn’t just banish the darkness from oneself. It was always there, the temptation was always there, you slipped sometimes, but you would get back up and yes she herself had her moments, her days where she’d slipped but she then worked her way back over the line, back into the light, with aid if she required it, but majority of the time on her own. Despite what everyone else believed Regina didn’t know if there truly was a such thing as coming back entirely from her past, from all she had done, especially with the dark magic that still swirled inside of her, yes a short time ago they had come to discover she in fact had the capacity for light as well but when you had spent so long only knowing one, only learning the darkness, focusing on it.. did it weigh out in the end? Yes Emma had not to far distantly in the past overcome the darkness, but with the team she had fighting to bring her back, with all that light, all that good bottled up inside of her even when she had given in the Mayor hadn’t thought for a second she wouldn’t be able to be pulled back across the line. The thing she didn’t realize was that the blonde felt very much the same, in regards to her and her redemption, she may be tempted, she may give in, fuck up from time to time but in the end the Sheriff knew she would never let Regina fall back entirely and that the darker woman didn’t want to slip back to her past self, that alone was more than enough to keep her on the lighter side. 

“Well that’s just bullshit Regina ,” Emma’s voice rings through strong in her conviction, “What makes him any better than you? Any more deserving of a chance to be good?” she reaches out now and does wrap a hand around one of the brunette’s arms, at the motion the arms wrapped around her own waist drop and Regina spins around to face the woman questioning her. They were so close now, and emerald orbs find darker ones, they both simply stare into each others eyes for what seems like an eternity when really it’s merely a few seconds as they both just read through the myriad of emotions in each others. 

Regina swallows as she prepares to speak, to answer with something she knows may be a horrible answer, but it’s the only word on repeat in her mind at the moment, the only possible answer to the questions. What makes him better? Why was he more deserving? Why not? After all he had swooped in and done a complete 360 after working with her Mother, with Greg and Tamara, yet she had gone back to her Mother out of hurt, pain, seeking someone, something familiar, looking for what she always had with her Mother, love; though she knew deep down it wasn’t possible without her heart, and it had all turned out to be another one of Cora’s classic manipulations of her yet she had to work her way right back from square one to proving herself all over again. What had he had to do? Seemingly nothing.

“You..” she answers simply and then pulls away walking off towards and into the kitchen, not looking back, letting the word, her reply, sink in, she knew it was nowhere near the kind of answer Emma had expected, and she herself needed space, air, something, she couldn’t look upon the blonde’s face right now and see the pain she had surely just inflicted with one single word. 

Emma stands rooted to the spot, it suddenly feels as if the entire room has gone ice cold, her hand hovers in the air as if still clutching onto the arm it had been, that one word had stung, dug deep, it made her realize just how deeply the wounds caused ran, and then to watch the Mayor run off. She wants to go to her, but she clearly needed a moment alone, the blonde hated this, she wanted to take it away, the pain, she knew that this all would not be a quick process. This would take time, and patience, there would be tears, there would be shouting, but she had meant what she had said to the brunette the previous night, she wanted this, and she would do what she needed to in order to help and make this work. So she finds the push, the drive and she goes into the kitchen and she wraps her arms around the woman who stands facing the window above the sink, she pulls her close, and even as the brunette turns in her arms and begins to pound at her chest lightly she continues to hold her. A hand moving up to the back of her head and pulling it into the crook of her neck, Regina’s hands cease their movements as she buries her face in the Sheriff’s neck and let’s the tears flow down her cheeks, her fists unclench and grab for the shirt the lighter woman wears, grasping tightly. Her entire form shakes slightly as she cries, and the younger woman kisses the side of her head softly.

“I’m so sorry Regina, I am,” her voice strains, “Please just talk to me, give me a chance to fix it all, as much as I can, but don’t shut down on me, don’t shut me out. I’ll deal with him, that’s my problem, my issue, him coming here was wrong, and if he comes by again I want you to call or send me a message rather than deal with him. I’m not saying you can’t handle him or yourself but I just..” she sighs, the woman in her arms takes a deep breath, she wills the tears to stop. Regina swallows thickly and nods against the neck and shoulder she is buried in, “I know there hasn’t always been the best of blood between you two in the past back home,” and oh does the brunette wish to laugh, a dry bark would suit right now because it was not simply just home, no it had carried over to here once Mother had come and the pirate along with. 

The Mayor stands more fully now as she pulls back and swipes at her own eyes, trying to dry them as much as possible, “He and I did not get along much better once he arrived here either Emma, and I still am not anywhere near a fan of his,” she leaves it simple but the blonde can almost sense that there is more, can feel the way it’s left open ended, as if there’s more to the sentence, a story, some examples or thoughts, and honestly she doesn’t get why the woman in front of her stopped herself from telling them. It wasn’t like Regina to stop from saying something unless she really and truly thought whatever it was to be revealed was going to cause lasting damage or simply was not her place to tell. 

“Why? What’s happened besides the team up?” she plays it safe in her own way of questioning, leaves it open, she knows that if the former Queen truly wishes to avoid the questions she will simply branch off of what she’s just asked and say it has something to do with the details of the team up perhaps. For once she’s glad she has that human lie detector inside of her, her magic, it was still something crazy to think about but she had grown used to it and now it didn’t even phase her anymore, though it was always fun to catch people in a lie from time to time and tell them about it.

“It’s not something I’m sure I should tell you, or rather that I should be the one telling you,” she murmurs softly, “It has to do with when Greg and Tamara were here, it’s not something light, not something easy..” and not something she wanted to talk about, it still gave her nightmares sometimes to wake from, being electrocuted was nothing fun, wasn’t something she ever had imagined and something she had not even thought of doing to any of her own victims as Queen. 

Emma can see and sense the internal debate and struggle within her friend right now, “Did he have something to do with them? With Henry’s kidnapping?” and Regina looks up into the lighter woman’s eyes now, if only it were that simple she thinks to herself.

“No..he..” she lets out a deep sigh, “he’s the one that handed me over to Greg..the one who strapped me to the table and cuffed me,” she takes a shuddering breath as she waits for that and what it means to sink in, she doesn’t have to wait long, the Sheriff’s face contorting to one of utter shock, disbelief, pain, and she looks for a moment as if she doesn’t know whether to scream or cry or perhaps both would be the best option at the present moment. 

“He..when I found you..he did that..” he had been the reason that the brunette had been electrocuted, been caught, been tortured, she was sure that if they’d enlisted his help that they, meaning Greg and Tamara, hadn’t been able to capture and subdue the brunette on their own, but then what force or methods had Hook used? What kind of shape had Regina been in when being restrained to that table, strapped down, had he then even hooked up the wires? Then just left her there and rushed off to play fake hero? The Savior shakes her head as she processes all of this, what this meant, Killian hadn’t ever mentioned this and apparently he at least had the brain to do that because she would never have forgiven him for it, never have been able to start a relationship with someone who could do that to her closest friend, the woman she loved. 

The Mayor simply nods, “He didn’t do the actual, you know, but he did what he had to in order to get me there and on that table, did his share of taunting beforehand..” she trails off and sighs dropping her gaze down as she begins to twist her hands together, “Emma I’m not telling you this to make you suddenly choose me, to suddenly think I’m a much better person, I know I have slipped on my journey, you give me many more props than I will ever give myself. I don’t think that I will ever truly be good, be a hero, not in the way that you are, not truly. There will always be a darkness in me, about me, I was raised with it, molded into the perfect little monster, a combination of Mother and Rumplestiltskin’s teachings, their ‘lessons’, but that and the fact that he was working with my Mother didn’t sit well with me at all, I couldn’t forgive him for either of those offenses, and I’m sure there are things I have done to him that he will never forgive me for either,” she knows there are, “but I don’t think he liked the time we spent together for more than just you then not being with him, if there is anyone in this town besides the imp who knows a lot of his past it was me, we had a fair amount of run ins back in the forest. I haven’t had an actual relationship since well.. Daniel, so don’t think I’m here trying to give some sort of advice or say what you two should or shouldn’t have discussed, gone over, but you know me Emma, you know my entire past for the most part, all the bad things I’ve done, not every single little detail for sure, because to go into that extent would take the rest of our lives, but you know more than enough and you can still manage to forgive my transgressions and look at me as a friend, as someone you love, as someone you want to potentially try to be with. For that I am truly floored, because I don’t know that I would be able to look at myself in the same light, but I suppose the point of it all is that you need to know things in order to go on from them and I know it can’t be easy to ever tell someone you love and wish to marry that you and their closest friend don’t get along, have a horrible past, some of the things you’ve done affected that person, but if there is one thing I have learned from Henry, from you,” she finally forces her eyes back up to find emerald which are glued to her, “Is that in the end the truth always finds a way out, so be honest from the beginning, be the one to tell others of what you’ve done because it’s always, always, ten times worse to have to hear it from another.”

Emma stands there rooted to the spot, unable to move a single muscle besides her eyelids as she simply blinks, it was so much to take in and process, but Regina was beyond right, she did know nearly everything about her and had managed to still forgive her and find a way to see the good in her, the brunette wasn’t standing here in front of her bashing her ex, wasn’t trying to make him seem any worse, even with what he had done, what he had taken a part in, she in an indirect way was standing here defending him almost. Telling the blonde that it was okay to forgive him, alright to figure out her feelings about it all, but that she understood how hearing things from a secondary or tertiary source was, but the Sheriff wasn’t sure how to really deal with this all right now, on top of everything else, so Hook had come here to tell the Mayor that she needed to stay away from her, that she was just playing a game with her. Now that she thought about it the whole situation she wondered what exactly he had said, what he had done, “I-,” she starts but falls silent once more not able to really come up with what to say.

“Do you want a glass of water?” the darker woman asks running a hand through her ebony locks uncertain of what to do right now, the blonde seems at a loss for words and she just feels as if she’s out of place in the moment. 

Rather than words the Sheriff just moves her head up and down to signal a yes, but as soon as the brunette goes to leave the room she opens her mouth, “Regina..” the first word and with it the woman spins back around taking a deep breath and exhaling it slowly, “You’re right.. it does hurt more to have to hear things from a secondary source, but I don’t think he’d have ever told me that and I can guess as to why,” their eyes meet before the next words leave light pink lips, “I wouldn’t have forgiven him.. I can’t forgive him for that,” she shakes her head from side to side as if to accentuate the point she’s making. “To cuff you, tie you down, but then come back acting as if he was some sort of hero helping us later to find you, where you were, as if he couldn’t have lead us there sooner, as if he didn’t have the chance to make sure you didn’t end up there or like that in the first place,” she swallows thickly, “finding you like that.. you weren’t even conscious when I found you Regina, you were barely breathing and I thought we were going to lose you, for a good few minutes I did truly believe it, a million and one thoughts rushed through my head, things I’d never told you, things I wished I could, the urge to smack you and tell you to stop faking it and just wake up.. I wasn’t in a good state finding you like that,” the blonde moves closer to her now and she can’t help the way that her breath catches in her throat. “He should have come clean about it, or if he wanted some form of forgiveness for it all should have even just told us sooner where you were seeing as he knew, there was no need to lie and deceive, to hide the truth.. unless he wanted you to suffer like that.. but no matter what you did to him, no matter what the two of you did to each other you didn’t deserve that.. and even if the tables were reversed right now, if it had been him in your position and you in his, I would say the same thing, he wouldn’t have deserved it either, so he has to pay for the choices he made, and to think he had the nerve to come here and try to lecture you on good and evil?” Emma scoffs, that was truly something else entirely, he really seemed to think he was above the woman who had cast the curse, really seemed to think himself a better person when in light of all this he had just made himself so much worse, undone so much of the false change he’d undergone, because that’s how she saw it now, as fake. She didn’t know that she could trust or believe anything he’d said or done, if he so easily avoided things, lied to her now, what else had he covered up in order to try and make himself seem more worthy, make himself appear to be the better person or choice for her?

“Emma I think you need to have some time to process all of this, you can’t simply jump to conclusions with it, as I said I too have struggled and failed to keep on the lighter side of things during my journey, I’m not saying I wish him forgiven or excused but do not let my personal vendetta cloud your judgment or view of him,” her voice holds some sense of pleading to it and it just makes the blonde want to scream more, because after it all Regina still tried to always make herself look worse, seem worse than anyone else.

“No!” the one word, two letters spoken with such conviction and the way that her voice booms, rings out causes the brunette to jolt slightly. “I don’t need time to think it over or process it Regina, I’m not discussing it with him, if he wants to suddenly bring it up then he can, I don’t know why he felt he had to hide it, I mean I get it, I do, but at the same time.. no. You did some pretty crazy bad shit, but I found it in me to forgive you, to sort it in my head, for fucks sake you nearly killed our son once, or at least I thought you had for a short period, seeing the whole magic thing didn’t make sense to me, I didn’t want to believe it all,” at that being brought up the brunette feels her heart strings tug painfully so, feels her chest tighten to the point that she nearly cannot breath. “He feels he can just come and talk shit to you but he has just as many skeletons in his closet, at least you’ve been honest with me and opened up about yours,” she huffs and then she’s closing the short distance between them and their eyes meet searching each others before the blonde’s hands come up to cup olive cheeks and pull her close as pale lips cover ruby red in a split second.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer : I DO NOT own OUAT or any of it's characters. 
> 
> Let me know what you think ? Leave a kudos ? Leave a comment ? Hopefully next update soon for this and SGW . I'll also be starting something new over the rest of this week and weekend so fingers crossed for fast progress !!
> 
> ENJOY

The blonde kisses her with such a passion, her lips move over hers so smoothly, their mouths mold together, they fit together like the last two pieces of the puzzle, perfectly. Pale hands remain cupping olive cheeks as she keeps the woman she loves close, she needs to show her that she won’t abandon her, that she’s here to stay and help her through any and all of the repercussions of her actions, the Sheriff wants to make up for the shitty feelings she knows she has caused. All of these things, all of her emotions pour into the kiss as she swipes her tongue over a red lower lip and Regina gasps at the motion, her lips part and invite the younger woman inside, her own hands come down to rest on rounded hips, she tugs her impossibly closer, their bodies press together, breast against breast, abdomen against abdomen, their hips falling into each others and the blonde begins to walk them backwards. Soon enough the countertop by the sink hits the former Queen’s lower back and she lets out a small hiss at the sudden shot of pain, but that doesn’t stop them from kissing each other, their lips are swollen as they finally pull back and Emma’s hands come down to glide over the brunette’s hips and down to her ass, squeezing the flesh beneath her palms. Emerald orbs remain locked onto dark eyes as the other woman groans at the action, “Em-ma,” she breathlessly whispers her name, broken into two syllables in a slower than normal speech fashion, her pupils are dilated, the Sheriff knows that if she could see her own she would find them to be in the same way. 

“Yes?” she manages the single word and thats about it as she swallows hard as her throat is suddenly far too dry, a pink tongue darts out to moisten her lips and she sees how the brunette’s gaze flickers down, tracking the wet muscle. 

“Please,” she wanted her, she needed her, needed to get lost in the sensations and feelings that were all Emma Swan right now, she didn’t want to think about Hook, didn’t want to think about what he had done, past or present. The brunette backed into the counter top wanted to be consumed by the woman who had her pressed against it the pain in her lower back from the edge of the marble was not something of her concern at the moment. In a swift but fluid movement it becomes an issue no more as Emma steps back just enough and hoists her up to sit on the counter, she steps in between her legs which spread to accommodate the Sheriff, her skirt rides up some to reveal the ends of the clips that hold her stockings into place and as the blonde moves her hands up and fingertips brush over them she can’t help the involuntary moan that claws its way up and out of her throat. She had assumed that Regina was wearing a full set of panty hose, but now she realized it was a garter set and oh was there a need to see it, just that, on the expanse of tanned skin that she was so ready to explore, mark, taste. 

Her eyes don’t leave the Mayor’s as she asks her next question, “Are you sure?” she receives a nod and a whispered ‘yes’ before her hands proceed any further. At the green light they roam upwards to find the zip on the side of the skirt, she tugs it down and Regina braces herself with her hands, pushes her hips up to allow those strong hands to roll the material over the swell of her ass and down, the blonde pulls the black material all the way down stepping back to allow such a feat and then tosses it behind them not looking nor caring where it will land. She hears the indignant huff and chuckles, it must have landed on the floor to garner such a response, or anywhere besides hung neatly in her closet obviously as that would probably have been the only suitable place in accordance to the darker woman.

“You will be paying the bill for that,” she shoots out and the lighter woman cannot do anything other than laugh throatily before she moves up to undo the small buttons of the dress shirt the older wears. She undoes them quickly and Regina is right behind her on the removal, not wasting a second as she shrugs it off her shoulders and then drops it to the countertop next to her, a hand reaches behind her to unclasp the black lacy bra encasing two perky mounds. The straps fall halfway down her biceps and as it’s dropped atop the shirt by her own hand, the brunette feels her nipples harden instantly at the sudden chill of the air compared to the temperature of her body. 

Emma doesn’t hesitate to drop her head down now and take one of the straining peaks into her mouth, lapping at it with her tongue, dark hair brushes lightly across her shoulder blades as her head falls back, blood red lips part in a moan and mocha orbs fade away as her lids grow heavy and slip closed. The only remaining garment on the expanse of olive skin is black lace panties and the blonde slips her hands into the waistband of them as she switches to the Mayor’s other nipple, she pops the elastic against her and Regina moans again, her breathing is heavier, ragged, her arousal spiking higher and higher with each swipe of that perfect tongue around her hardened nipple. Her hands weave through the messy golden locks atop the Savior’s head and she tugs slightly, emerald orbs find darker ones and she raises a brow in question before she feels the hands in her hair trail down to the tops of her shoulders pushing her down. She quickly gets the silent request and moves the black material down, Regina aiding in the removal by once again lifting her hips, and then as soon as they are gone a tongue sneaks out from behind teeth and lips as the blonde sinks down to her knees and swipes once through the ample wetness, “EmmA,” she cries out, the last letter hitting a higher octave as pleasure ripples through her core and throughout her entire body. 

The breathless calling of her name simply spurs her on, pushes her into action as she wants to hear just how many ways the brunette above her can utter those four letters that make up her name. The lighter woman lifts both of the still tight and heel clad legs over her shoulders and now she dives right in, grip on muscular thighs tight, as she spreads her, as she flattens her tongue to tease lower lips apart before pushing it inside, just the tip for now. Slow, shallow thrusts follow and the hands return to her hair gripping hard as Regina’s hips buck of their own accord, as she whimpers and whines at the teasing strokes that are not nearly enough to get her there, she wants to protest, to demand the woman who is slowly driving her mad cease her teasing and just fuck her, but she knows the blonde too well and thinks that such actions may cause her to drag this out even longer. “T-tease,” she settles for the single word instead and she’s rather glad she does as more than just one word would have sounded even more of a mess. 

Emma chuckles which sends vibrations up straight through her clenching sex, before the Mayor can say anything else in response though the tongue that has barely pushed inside of her up to this point sinks as deep as it possibly can, one of the hands wrapped around her thighs moves from its place to come down between those thick thighs that press down on her shoulders. She continues her rhythm she’s begun with her tongue as two fingers come to tease around the woman’s sex, rubbing, spreading her lower lips further to allow more of her to be consumed and Regina doesn’t have to ask to know that the blonde definitely knows her way around a woman’s body, the perfect amounts of pressure, the perfect balance of teasing featherlight touches mixed with the strong thrusts of her tongue, her head bobs back and forth to aid her in achieving harder and faster movements. 

The sounds the former Queen is making are music to her ears, spiking her own arousal, she feels her own panties beginning to soak, stick to her uncomfortably, but she keeps going, ignores that feeling for now. The brunettes clit throbs, swollen and begging for it’s own attention as well and it’s almost as if the Sheriff senses this because the two fingers that have been teasing now line up at her drenched entrance as her tongue slips out and makes it’s way upward. She circles the tiny pearl not giving any direct touch and just as the darker woman’s mouth opens, no doubt to complain or order her to it, she slips both fingers inside of her and any words that she had thought she might say to the woman between her thighs die in her throat, a gasp rips from it instead and she back arches forward, her head falling back to rest against the cabinet behind her. Fingers tighten, blunt nails scrap her lover’s scalp and her hips cant, moving closer to the digits that push in and out gaining speed and force with each thrust. Her mind goes to thoughts of the many times she had seen those strong arms of the blonde and she feels the strength now that she had always seen, that she hadn’t been able to resist thinking about, in this way, how she would be able to surely bring her over the edge by fucking her with the slim fingers attached to such muscles. Her stamina had to be great and she hates that she hadn’t said anything sooner because oh what a waste these arms were to a man. 

The brunette’s thoughts are suddenly ended as the wet muscle that had been circling now finally, with a barely there caress, brushes over her clit, she swears she sees stars behind her eyelids with how much tighter they suddenly clench, “E-emma!” she half screams half moans the name, she hadn’t been anticipating the tender touches to her bundle of nerves, it aches for the attention, so sensitive already for having been neglected for so long, and theres something about the mixture of rough and tender in the way the Sheriff’s fingers move versus her tongue. The combination of all the sensations, the way that the blonde’s nails on her hand firmly gripping a tanned thigh, digging into the flesh below, leave crescent shaped marks in their wake, she curls her fingers upward, brushing against that ribbed patch of flesh just inside, pressing against it. Emma moans as more wetness leaks out from Regina’s core, it sends tiny shocks up through her causing her stomach to tighten, she feels her orgasm building within her and it feels so good to be brought so close to the edge so quickly, as the Sheriff sucks hard, as she slips a third finger inside along with the other two now she can’t hold back, she wouldn’t want to anyway. Her lips part in a silent scream as the pressure builds up in her abdomen, as she feels like she’s already dripping so much that she must have cum, but she hasn’t, not yet, and the woman between her legs seems intent to make her cum hard, she seems to want her to explode as she suddenly ceases her attention to her clit and focuses solely on thrusting in and out of the darker woman. 

“Em-ma!” she gasps aloud, she tries to tug her head back to her aching sex but the blonde simply grins widely looking up at her instead.

“Not yet my Majesty,” she husks and her mouth is suddenly back on her but not where she wants it or needs it, but it’s so close, almost there, her teeth latch onto the brunette’s inner thigh and it hurts, but oh does it hurt so good, she swears she could come right on the spot from that, combined with the fingers buried deep inside of her. No one had ever done that to her before, no one had ever dared, no one ever even thought to bite her as Queen and even as the uptight Mayor persona she had worn, no, no one dreamt of it, it was something new and something she found she enjoyed so much as Emma’s fingers pushing in and out make a wet sound, as her core clenches so tightly around the intruding digits and she let’s out a scream, a moan, of pure pleasure, it had never felt like this with anyone else and her thighs begin to shake, tremble atop the strong shoulders, her grip falters in golden locks and she doesn’t know what she wants more, the Savior to continue sucking and biting on her inner thigh so close to her sex or to move those lips and tongue back to her little nub of pleasure, she is truly torn. 

Emma has her own plans though, her own goals in mind and once she’s marked the flesh between her teeth deeply, a dark shade of purple is left in the wake of her mouth as it moves back to where it had been, and suddenly she feels a burn, a slight stretch and then she realizes that a fourth finger has been added to the mix and her heart rate and breathing both pick up. It wasn’t overly painful, her arousal allows smooth access, but suddenly she wonders for a second if the Sheriff is going to attempt more and she shakes her head, “N-no more,” she stumbles over the words. The lighter woman keeps her thrusts but looks up, un-attaching herself from the wet heat she’s throughly enjoying once more.

“Just this,” she reassures softly, “My beautiful Queen, so full of me, I love you,” and Regina’s heart does somersaults at the care, the deep emotions she sees behind those colored orbs, the feelings those words stir deep inside of her, she wants to utter them back, but she also has another feeling rushing through her, fear, fear of what happens if the woman leaves, if one day she wakes and realizes it was.. is all a mistake. But before she can continue anything else of that train of thought Emma’s mouth is back upon her and within seconds her back is arching nearly painfully so, her head falling back against the cabinet once more, eyes clamping shut, her thighs quake, her arms and hands tighten, muscles going taut as her orgasm rips through her with such intensity. 

She let’s out a scream, it’s unintelligible of whether it contains the younger woman’s name or not, or if it’s simply a long drawn out sound, something more resembling of a moan, Emma slows her fingers, removing herself from her now oversensitive sex as she helps her to ride out her orgasm. 

Regina works to regain her breath, tries to calm her frantic hear that is pounding in her chest, she forces her eyes open but she keeps her head against the cabinet, unable to look at the woman in front of her just yet. She tries to push the overwhelming thoughts that are racing forward into her mind back and away, she doesn’t want to ruin this, ruin this moment. She had just had the best orgasm of her life and here she was being bombarded by dark thoughts, by doubts that she deep down knew were not even legitimate to fear or worry about.. or were they. Ebony locks shake side to side and Emma stands now, concerned, “Regina?” she asks softly, the name a whisper on her lips. “Are you okay? I didn’t do anything wrong did I?”

And that makes it worse, the fact that the Savior thinks she had done something wrong, that this was her doing the fact that the brunette just couldn’t let herself be happy for more than five seconds before ruining it with her own brain, her own thoughts. She forces her eyes down to peer into the sea foam color in her line of sight, “No,” she shakes her head this time for a different reason, to further confirm her words rather than to shake thoughts from her mind, “Emma it’s not you, I swear it’s not.. I just sometimes I let my mind get away from me..” she confesses, and the way that the blonde reaches up to cup her cheek makes her want to pull away but lean into the caress all at the same time. “I-,” she starts but she doesn’t know how to finish it, she can’t, she’s so caught in her head with whispers that ‘love is weakness’ that she doesn’t deserve her own happy ending, but here it was holding her tenderly, wasn’t it?

Emma sees the inner conflict and she can’t help but feel bad, feel as if she hadn’t exactly helped the situation even if the Mayor said it wasn’t her doing but her own, because at the end of the day this was her doing, she had let herself believe one thing instead of simply working up the courage for fear of rejection. And that, that one action had spurred everything else into action, Regina hadn’t confessed anything either until recently but with everything she’d been through in regards to love.. she couldn’t blame her for her silence on the matter. The Sheriff steps back from her, dropping her hand down to her side, her other hand is still covered in the former Queen’s essence and she doesn’t know what to do with it besides just hold it semi behind her back, she shifts from foot to foot averting her gaze. 

“Emma.. it’s not your fault I swear,” she tries, but she knows deep down that just like her the light eyed beauty shares the similarity with her that self blame is the easiest solution, that it must be a problem you caused, or something to do with you, because there was no other option in her mind. It was one of the downsides to the constant hurt and everything else they had each gone through growing up, the mental abuse, the rejections, by those who were supposed to love you unconditionally, your parents, the love lost, everything just added up, built up and after awhile it was easier to say something must be wrong with you that makes it so that you can’t just be happy, that you can’t just keep people, that you can’t just stop ‘screwing everything up’. 

“I.. I know, I just, let me give you some time to think things over, let me clear my own head,” and before the disheveled, nearly naked Mayor can do anything else, before she can utter another word, before she can reach for the Sheriff.. she’s gone in a cloud of white smoke, the wisps remaining in the air for a moment after. 

And yet again she falls to her cycle of self blame, of how she hadn’t been able to simply push past her mind, how she’d let herself show the things inside that she didn’t want to other to know. With a flick of her wrist she’s in her shower, naked now, the hot water running over her body, cooling her at the same time as warming her from the sudden chill she’d gotten once left alone. 

 

 

Meanwhile Emma has gone back to her place and she lays in her bed, stares up at the ceiling, she knew Regina was right, it wasn’t her fault, but it also wasn’t the Mayor’s either, it was a joint effort besides the pasts that they had, they were their own downfalls in the end, and she has a hunch of what had suddenly troubled the woman she loved. She was afraid of waking from the dream, that it was all just going to be ripped away from her in a moment, with no warning, and she couldn’t fault her for these thoughts and ideas because sadly she had the same ones. 

She should go back there she tells herself, she shouldn’t leave the brunette alone, it wasn’t good to be alone with thoughts like that raging throughout your mind, but she also knew they needed a moment each to breathe, to try and regain their own composures, so she settles for her other idea and sends a text message out. 

 

Text Message to Regina Mills: Hey I’ll be back in a bit, just think we both need to clear our heads for a moment. I’m not going to leave you. I promise.

 

Regina is just stepping out of the shower, it had been more of a rinse, just some time spent under the spray to clear her head for now, when she hears the tell tale beep of her phone notifying her of a text. She swipes to unlock and looks down to read, she lets out a sigh, she and Emma really just needed to move past this idea that they, who shared so much, who had so much in common, would be just like everyone else in their lives. 

She doesn’t reply, instead she places the device down and with a flick of her wrist and some focus unlocks the front door so that when her friend does make her way back she can enter with no problem. 

 

 

Back at the house Henry comes and knocks on his Mother’s door, “Ma?” he asks, as quiet ‘come in’ is his response and he pushes the door open to enter. “You alright?”

And she wants to say yes, wants to tell him she will be but right now she feels like she just keeps having fuck up after fuck up, “I could use a hug,” is her simple reply and he moves forward to wrap his arms around her tightly. 

“It’s gonna be okay, you’ll get it figured out, it will work out how its supposed to,” and a tear rolls down her cheek as she is once more reminded of how much older he is now, how much he’s gone through himself up to this point. “You and Mom always get through things better together, you better be planning on going back there or her coming here,” and the way he almost sounds like he’s scolding her has her bursting into a fit of chuckles.

“I told her I’d be back shortly,” she reassures him and he releases her.

“Good then get ready, and go get her,” she beams at him and kisses his forehead before gathering herself and heading out. What she doesn’t expect as she makes her way to her bug though is one very intoxicated Killian Jones making his way towards her.

**Author's Note:**

> R&R please and stick around for more?


End file.
